Local beer review pokes fun at Wakachangi taste

A group of university students called Wakachangi beer the worst part of the Snackachangi chips pairing.

The review appeared in the latest issue of the student newspaper, Critic Te Arohi. The writers compared the beer to a wet drip of a brother. They said the drink flies like a chicken and tans like an albino.

The team described the flavor profile in blunt terms. They said the beer tastes like a Dobro. One writer compared drinking it to licking the bedsheets of a flatmate who had an accident. They noted that at least the sheets might have some ketamine residue. The beer, they said, smells mustier than an octogenarian's orgy at Carousel.

The reviewers noted that the marketing team deserves credit for the can design. They said the branding successfully distracts drinkers from the need to open the can. They mentioned rumors that a student named Daniel Leamy is fleeing on exchange due to a close encounter with the beer. They clarified that the encounter was not with the yarn printed on the can.

The group explained how they acquired the sample. They said they did not buy the box. They received the beer from a host who was hosting a gathering. They stated that they would not buy the beer again unless they were bribed or sponsored. They compared their willingness to accept free samples to American senators.

The writers concluded their review by telling first year students that they are not getting a free first year. They thanked their editors for keeping the writing sober. They noted that the reviews would have sounded more drunk without editorial checks.

The publication plans to continue releasing these reviews every two weeks. The team acknowledged that they sometimes miss the deadline. They described the process as great fun for the flat that writes the pieces.